Often the cause of our own unhappiness lies in ourselves. We become a generator of negative energy and negative thoughts. “I’m fat,” “I have a terrible job,” “I must look awful,” and so on. The truth is that we are actually much better than we think. We just lack confidence.
Here are some psychological tricks you can use to gain confidence:
- Be confident.
If we do not believe in our success, no one will believe in us. If we do not value our qualities, no one will appreciate them. If we do not believe what we say, no one will believe. To do this, make sure you look, behave and speak confidently. Stand up straight, do not mumble under your nose, speak clearly, look the interlocutor in the eye. It is advisable to get rid of expressions such as “I’m not sure, but„ “,” Maybe „”
- To find the root of the problem.
Self-confidence is often due to complexes that a person carries over time as an invisible burden. Get rid of this burden. For this purpose it is necessary to get to the bottom of the problem, to find its root.
- Let’s talk about our strengths.
Don’t be ashamed to point out your strengths. If you know something from others, do it. If you know anything more, say so. Do not shrink in the corner, because no one will notice you. This does not earn respect.
- Do not present a false version of yourself.
A common mistake at a job interview or on a first date with someone – we tend to exaggerate or even lie about some of our qualities, habits, shortcomings. But think about it – if this person is going to be in your life for at least a while, how long can you hide the truth?
- Do not overdo it with secrecy.
It is clear that each person sometimes hides some of his qualities, we enter a role, we present ourselves a little better. And this is normal. But don’t forget who you really are. Remind yourself to step out of a role. Think about when, why and with whom you behave differently? If you have a person in your life to whom you are instinctively not yourself and you are trying to present your better version, think about what this is due to and whether it is so important for you to look better in that person’s eyes. After all, this is exhausting behavior and cannot last forever.
- Do not be afraid to be the center of attention.
No one likes posers, but when necessary, stand proudly and confidently in the spotlight. If you have to give a presentation to a team, speak clearly and distinctly, try to capture the eyes and attention of the audience. Do not sweat from anxiety, do not break your fingers, do not look away. Smile and look into his eyes.
- Do not change your mind.
This does not mean not listening to the opinions of others and living stubbornly, but if you want to order fish in a restaurant, for example, and the waiter takes over to convince you what wonderful lamb they offer, do not change your mind. You have already made your choice, stand up for it. Of course, it can be something much more significant than that. But usually the decisions about the important things are rooted in the decisions for the small ones.
- Don’t let guilt overwhelm us.
Instilling guilt and fear is a powerful weapon and, above all, an excellent tool for manipulation. Do not give in and fall into the trap. This problem is most often rooted in childhood. If a child grows up feeling guilty, he or she is more likely to become an insecure adult who is easily manipulated. Do not leave this problem unresolved. Forgive yourself first!
- To find our flaws in a celebrity.
For example, if we think we have short legs or a crooked nose, we would feel much better if we find the same flaws in a star who has a glamorous career and is loved by hundreds of thousands.
- Assess what hinders us on the way to the goal.
Write your goal on a piece of paper. Now he wrote down the pros and cons of that goal. Then think and re-formulate in writing why you have not yet achieved it. What’s bothering you? How to solve the problem? Make a plan and follow it. Repeat to yourself that you can handle it.
- Stop paying public opinion tax.
Don’t live like horses with caps, of course, without respecting other people’s opinions and thinking that you are always right. But do not be enslaved to other people’s opinion. Forget about stereotypes imposed by movies, books, society. Follow your path, find what makes you happy and don’t miss it.